A Diary of Two Iraqi Girls
February 2003

The following diary passages were given to the Foundation by Ramzi Kysia, a member of the Iraq Peace Team (IPT) an initiative of Voices in the Wilderness. According to Kysia, the passages are from the diary of Amira, a 14-year-old Iraqi girl, and her 9-year-old sister, Layla. The girls wrote these entries during the last 2 months of 2002, and gave them to IPT to be translated and published in the US. For more information on the Iraqi Peace Team click here.

AMIRA
My name is Amira and I didn't go to school because of the financial circumstances. I left school at the age of 8 years old. I was in the third grade. No one in our family completed school. Not my father, mother or brothers. I have 2 brothers, 2 sisters and my parents. Father is an old, sick man and he and my mother don't work. I, Amira, is the only one who works.

I wake up at 7am and go to the bathroom, wash my face with soap and water, then eat bread and tea for breakfast, and go to work. I say, "with God's blessing," and go to the market and buy 30 packs of chewing gum and go to work in Karrada Street, and work until 3 or 4pm. Then I go home, enter the bathroom for a bath, wash my clothes, and read with my younger sister, Layla.

A man told me to go to school and study. I get ashamed a lot, and said, "please, Allah, remove the sanctions from the Iraqi people." And I am in pain because I didn't attend school. I see girls go to school and regret that I cannot, because it is a treasure, and man's future.

***

LAYLA
My name is Layla. I am nine years old. I am a student in the third grade elementary school. I wake up at 7am, wash my face with water, then go to the market to get breakfast which is egg and bread. After breakfast, I wear the school uniform and go to school by 8am. My school is far away. It's 15 minutes. I go to home by 12pm, then enter my home and my mother would be preparing lunch which is a potato sandwich. Then I go to sleep and wake up in the afternoon to write my homework, and stay awake until 9pm. I don't watch TV because ours is broken and we can't buy one. Every day I go to the neighbors to watch TV, and then stay with my sister at home. My mother says that she'll work to buy us a TV and so my sister Amira doesn't have to work. I will work to save money and buy a TV.

***

AMIRA
My name is Amira and on Tuesday I wake up at 7am. My mother said that she'll go and buy breakfast, then I would wash my face with water and soap and change my clothes and wear work clothes. Then my mother came with eggs, bread and tea, and I said to myself that I would like to sit at home, but our finances would not help. Then my mother said, "take care, Amira." I said, "don't worry, I know," and she said, "go, Amira, Allah be with you my dear daughter." Then I left home at 8am and went to the market to get chewing gum to sell in the street. I made 3000 dinar [$1.50 US] and gave it to my mother.

By 12 noon I eat a cheese sandwich, and at 3pm I went to the market to buy bread and paid 500 dinar [25 cents] for some dates, grapes and cheese. I went home and all my family was awaiting me. My younger brothers were waiting at the door. When they saw me they ran towards me and took the bag and ate. After eating we stayed until 9pm and then went to sleep. I went to bed, but my mother said, "let me heat the water for you to wash." I bathed and went to bed by 10pm. I was very tired and sleep until 3am to open the water and help my mother until 4am, then go to sleep again.

***

AMIRA
Sometimes I don't go to work because I am sick. It's a nasal disease, and I have a headache. Once I went to work and a man said to me, "Why are you like that -you are a little girl. Go to school." I was very sick. I went to the park, sat there and had a gloomy mood. I said if there were no sanctions I would have attended school.

Sanctions has affected us like that, effected the Iraqi people. Sometimes there children, women and men sleeping in the street. They are poor and feel bad and say, "Allah, remove these sanctions."

I wake up at 6am, and my mother would say, "are you going to work?," and I say, "yes." My sister, Layla, said, "will you be back at 4pm?," and I said, "I don't know. God knows." When I would leave the house, mother would look at me with a tear in her eyes and say, "until when my Amira will be like this?" And I would smile and say, "Don't be sad, God is merciful." Then she would say, "God be with you my daughter," and I would leave the house.

I am 14 years old and work in the streets. I love to go to school and sometimes I am ashamed of myself. My friends say, "Amira, where do you go?" I say, "to work." Yasmeen, my friend, says, "why do you go to work?" I say, "Who'll support my family?" Deep in my heart I wish I didn't have to go to work in the street. I go home in the evening very tired. I have rice and soup for dinner, and go to bed. I send this letter to the dearest people in America, who are against the sanctions and the Zionists. I hope from Allah to give you good health and all that you hope for.

***

LAYLA
I wake up at 7 in the morning and go to the bathroom to wash my face with water and soap. Then my mother prepares breakfast which is yogurt, bread and tea. I go to school at 8am. I study at school then I go home. My mother prepares lunch, so I would eat and change my clothes and go to the bath. Then I sleep in the afternoon. Then I write my homework with my mother's help.

I don't go out with my friends because I have no money. I said to my mother if we have some money? And mother said we have just 10,000 dinars [$5 US], and I want you to go to the market and buy tomatoes, potatoes, and bread so I can prepare food for you because Amira is going to come tired from work. Amira comes from work and goes to the bathroom and came out of the bathroom. We ate dinner. I said why don't we save money so we can buy a TV?, and Amira said "Allah is a great giver." Then we went to bed at 9pm.

***

AMIRA
Once upon a time I was at work around 3pm on Sunday. I was playing with my friend Selma. I told Selma that we should go home, but she said that we'll go at 6pm. A boy named Mahmoud came from a distance holding a big, iron bar in his hand. Mahmoud threw the iron bar in the street, but it hit my food and I had a big wound.

My foot started bleeding a lot. I went to the hospital in a taxi while my foot is bleeding. We had only 2000 dinar [$1 US] on us, and went to a nurse who said that she would clean the wound and took 1500 dinar, and I had only 2000. So I said, "how much do you want after dressing my wound?" Then I went home and my mother was sad to see what happened to my foot.

Day after day I went to the hospital and they would clean it and dress it, and I would pray to Allah to heal my foot. After 9 days an old man came and said, "what's wrong with your foot?," and I told him the story. The man said, "would you go to a doctor?" I said that I have no money. He said, "come with me to the hospital." We went to the hospital and they sew my foot with stitches. Then the doctor prescribed me medicines. After all of this the man paid 15,000 dinar [$7.50 US]. After paying 15,000 at the hospital for the stitching and medicine, the man said to me go and stay at home and I'll pay you the money. Stay for 7 days. I said, "you can't do that," and the man said, "no problem." I will give you $20 US so you can stay at home. I went home and stayed for 7 days taking medicine. Then my wound healed and I thanked Allah and said to the man, "bless you and thank Allah for my good condition."

***

AMIRA
Oh God, remove the sanctions on the Iraqi people and Mohammad's nation.
God protect our people.

When I go to work, I won't sit, but keep running and walking, and stopping a little bit and then get back to work. All of this to get money to buy food for my family. All of this because of the sanctions. This life has destroyed my life and my family's life. I work so my family will have food. I pay rent for the house which is 30,000 dinar [$15 US] a month. I didn't study because of the bad circumstances for 5 years now. I left school and I regret that. I see the children study and I feel very sad.

Today, I wake up at 6am and go to the bathroom. I wash my face with water and soap. My mother makes my breakfast wish is tea, bread and yogurt. I get full, thank God. I am change to my work clothes. Before going to work my mother would say, "take care, Amira," and I would say, "yes, don't worry."

I go to work, go to the market and buy chewing gums to sell in the street, and work until 11am, then buy an egg sandwich and tea, then go back to work. A man said to me, "why don't you go to school?" I said, "I don't go to school." The man said, "school is best, daughter." I said, "our circumstances is not helping."

The man said, "how many are you at home?" I said, "Six, and no one works but me." The man said, "are they old?" And I said, "No, they are young. One is 2 years old, one is 11 years old, one is 9 years old, I am 14 years old, and my parents." The man said, "God is merciful, hopefully your circumstances will change."

I got really sad, then it was 1pm in the afternoon and I had a fight with a boy who hit me on the mouth and I started bleeding. He ran away and I started to cry. A man came from the restaurant and gave me a bottle of water and a tissue and 100 dinars [5 cents]. I thanked the man then I went home.

My little brothers was waiting for me at the door. They came running happily towards me and I entered the home, and my mother was sad. I said, "why are you sad, mother?" My mother said, "I am sad because you have to work to support us and not go to school like the other children." I said, "it's okay, mother," and laughed. Sadness is in the heart, not the eyes.

***

AMIRA
In the middle of winder it's very cold. I go to work with other children and we all wonder until how log we are going to be that way. My father can't work, and I have to get the bread and food for the family, and all this is due to the sanctions.

I got very sick in mid-winter. My nose started hurting me and I didn't go to the doctor, so now I have nasal problems. Sometimes I would wake up with a painful headache, and I have no money to go to the hospital to do a nasal operation. They want 100,000 dinar [$50 US] and I have no money. Everyday I pray to God to heal me. Then I sit a little bit to stop the dizziness, and hurry to buy medicine which doesn't help me. Some people say, "why don't you do the operation and get rid of it?" And I would say, "I have no money." When I have money I buy medicine from the pharmacy or buy clothes for my brothers and food for the house. I buy cakes and fruits for the family when I have money, and I would say, "the money goes and comes." From today I decided to save money for the operation to be good.

If there were no sanctions, life would not be expensive. Life would be beautiful. Sanctions has effected all of us, and Palestine is in the hand of Zionist criminals. God willing, sanctions will go from Iraq and Palestine, and Palestine will be liberated from the criminals. And I, Amira, would go back to school and won't have to work, and won't get hurt when seeing the other girls at school.

***

AMIRA
I sat at home on Friday. I woke up at 9am, then went to the bath and washed my face with soap and water, and ate bread, tea and eggs for breakfast. Then I washed the dishes and changed my clothes to help my mother with the house work. Then I cleaned the house and went to the market to buy meat, tomatoes, onions and bread. I worked with my mother until 12pm. Mother made us lunch and we ate it. Mother said to me and my sister, Layla, that we'll go to our aunt's house. Auntie was happy to see us, and brought us tea and cake, and I had 2000 dinars [$1 US] and gave them to my aunt who refused to take them, but I insisted and said, "if you don't take it I won't see you again." My aunt is in need for me, and I have her all that I had. She would prepare food for her children, and I am happy for that.

***

AMIRA
I went to work and saw a 13 year old girl go to school with my friend, and I became sad when I saw her. I went to work, bought chewing gums to sell, and went to work. When I see a girl my age and my sister's age happy with clothes and I would give her good words.

A man asked me, "why don't you go to school? Why stay in the street? You are pretty, why are you in the streets?" I said, "our circumstances doesn't allow me to go to school. My father is sick and mother works at home, and I have a little sister and two younger brothers. No one works but me." The man became sad and said, "may God make it better for you."

All of what the man said to me made me sad, and I was going to cry, but was careful for my tear not to drop. All of this was at 1pm, and I made 3000 dinar [$1.50 US], and this is the memorial day of the Prophet, and I want a lot of money on this day, and all I have is 3000. I went to a man friend and asked him to give me 2000 dinar and I will pay him tomorrow. He agreed and gave me 2000 dinar. I thanked him and went to the marked and bought nuts and sweets and candles and incense, and went home and saw guests in our house. It was my aunt and her kids, and all the things I bought were 3500 dinar, and I still had 1500 on me and it wasn't enough. So I went to my friend to borrow 3000, and I would pay her tomorrow, and told her I would give her 4000 for her 3000, and she agreed.

I went to the market and bought meat, tomatoes, bread, dates and onions, and felt better. It was 5pm, and I prepared the table, candles and incense, and kept sweets in the plates and the nuts too. It was 6pm and we were celebrating the birthdate of the Prophet. I gave a small plate of sweets and nuts to the neighbors who are poor, and to my aunt and her kids. We celebrated until 8pm, and then mother prepared dinner, and we ate and thanked God for the food, and stayed awake until 10pm and mother laid beds, but it wasn't enough, so Layla and I slept on the carpet.

Then at morning I went and bought bread and cheese and came back to prepare breakfast. They all wake up and saw the food ready, and my mother said, "God give you long life." We all ate. My aunt's husband is dead, and I have my aunt money for the taxi and we said goodbye. Then I went to work.

God is merciful. He sent me a man who paid me 8000 dinar [$4 US]. I paid my friends the debt I owed them and thanked them. I thanked God again for his mercy, and that he gave me money to feed my aunt and her children. I went home happy because I paid my debts. And I pray God to remove the sanctions from the children of Iraq and Palestine.

***

AMIRA
I didn't study. I didn't go to school. I am not like other girls who go to school, go to relatives, have friends, games. I go to work, come home, and that's it. So far life isn't pretty.

I get sad when people are leading a happy life and we live a bad life. I am not supposed to think of life at this age, but I can't but think when seeing my family in a bad situation. But I pray and say, "God is merciful." Girls my age should go to school, and parks, and play games, have friends and visit relatives. But so far I didn't see but bad things and sadness. I smile in front of people, but I am sad inside. No one knows what's in my heart but God.